The latest viral tweet among the Question Twitter Set is one that asks, "All my New Yorkers, which is the best seat?" The question is accompanied by a photo showing the orange L-shaped seat layout often found on some cars in our subway system, with numbers on each seat (1 being the closest to the door; 4 being the corner, front-or-back-facing seat). Many New Yorkers have chimed in declaring which is the "best" seat, which has compelled me to declare the obvious: there is no "best" seat (unless we're talking aesthetically, in which case the best subway seat is the back corner on an R-46 with a 1970s color palette).
There can be no "best" seat, because every human is not the same, and every subway car is not the same. And even if every human and subway car layout were somehow uniform, the circumstances are never the same. Sure, you may think you love seat 1, but what if seat 1 is wet with some unidentified "city juice"? What if seat 1 is next to someone who is clipping their nails? What if seat 1 is just giving off some bad vibes today? What if seat 1 is taken and your runner-up seat is available but Tom Hanks is manspreading into it?
Here, allow Native New Yorker Jake Dobkin to be the voice of reason in this silly debate:
"The reason the question is generating so much discussion is that it's posed in an uncertain way, namely, it's not clear how crowded the train is. Obviously, in a completely empty car, you sit closest to the door, so you can get out when a crazy person gets on and tries to molest you. In a somewhat crowded car, it depends on how far you're going. The window seat is good for a longer trip, but if you're getting off at the next stop you want to be able to get off without asking someone to move. And on a completely crowded car, the best seat is whatever seat is free, as long as it's not covered in something gross. Real New Yorkers understand these nuances, whereas tourists (and social media influencers who moved to the city three weeks ago) just throw out numbers."
Do you still want to believe there is a "best" subway seat, maybe so that you feel like you've won whenever you get it? That's fine, but I would recommend embracing the everchanging subway car scenario, and then you'll never be let down. After all, sometimes the "best" subway seat is standing... and on a particularly rough commute, standing while conjuring a subway seat in your mind, one that is not even on a subway car, but on a beach, at sunset, with a little cup holder holding your beverage of choice, on an island where there is no access to Twitter.
Update: We reached out to the MTA this morning to get Andy "Train Daddy" Byford's opinion on the matter, and received this statement, "I don’t usually use seats when I ride because they are for customers. As for choosing the best, that’s like asking a parent to pick a favorite child. Each one is special in its own way. I just love that people are kicking off the 2020s talking about subway seating."
